In my bedroom….
I wish I could say I was man enough to Kill the little fucker…
But I screamed like a lil girl till it ran away…
#ONEOFTHOSEMOMENTS
Monday, 26 August 2013
Friends, Acquaintances and Phone Number Collectors…
I sit in my room, looking threw my Facebook and My Phone……
Over 700 Facebook friends, Only 70 Numbers….
Man I feel Like a total looser
I lost my phone recently and asked people to msg me with their number, a selection of people did and the rest……….. well guess they are just a FB number.
I can see the people who care and ask how I am, and the people who ask if I wanna join them to get drunk, the rest of the numbers….. collects dusts, if thats even possible in cyber world….
The world seems to become a darker place the older you become
I miss the times of seeing things as a giant bubble, and sitting in my bedroom when sick saying out load “Please god, make me better, make me better” and having the innocents to believe he/she would…….
On my way home I went to boots and bought some witchhazel, and I smelled it, it made me remember my late nana who would give this to me when I fell over and scraped my knee…. she would tell me it was a witch’s potion that would make me better…
How I miss those days.
Thursday, 15 August 2013
The Twink Within Has Gone!
I remember in summer 1998, when Ginger Spice walked out on The Spice Girls, her reason for leaving was she left she could no longer live her fantasy character, and she needed to be herself…
And up until recently I never quite new what It meant to live life within a character…
BUT I now feel as if I have done the same, Since moving to London, I was court up in wearing a super large bag, tight TIGHT t-shirts, and super TIGHT skinny Jeans, I wanted to look as young as possible, I wanted to be part of the TWINK crowd….
I don’t want this lonely lifestyle anymore….
It’s taken me many years to finally admit I feel countable within my skin…….. I enjoy being around good people, and the GAY DRAMA of who said what, just does not interest me anymore…….
I feel I have a heart full of LOVE, and one day I believe I will find that person for me…………. Until that day, I will focus on loving myself…
“It’s Time To Love Yourself”
I have not been feeling my best of late, with having a serious Kidney Infection and all….
Taking a large amount of pills is taking pills with my mood and feeling tired 24/7 but hey C’est La Vie!!!
I just keep thinking back to what the doctor told me on Saturday….. “It’s Time To Love Yourself”
I never quite knew what it meant to love yourself, I started making lists of all the bad things I have done to my body…. Drinking too much / smoking over 30 a day…. taken Drugs….. all things I thought would give me a day or two side effects……. but maybe this is my body’s way of saying “THOMAS, SERIOUSLY STOP HURTING ME” which is doctors terms means to Love Myself???
Hmmm I feel so confused right now……………….
A Fat Ginger Kid…….
Just walked past me in the street picking his nose……..
I looked at him with discuss as I remember…………
The Fat Ginger Kid, was once ME!!!
Friends, Acquaintances and Phone Number Collectors…
I sit in my room, looking threw my Facebook and My Phone……
Over 700 Facebook friends, Only 70 Numbers….
Man I feel Like a total looser
I lost my phone recently and asked people to msg me with their number, a selection of people did and the rest……….. well guess they are just a FB number.
I can see the people who care and ask how I am, and the people who ask if I wanna join them to get drunk, the rest of the numbers….. collects dusts, if thats even possible in cyber world….
The world seems to become a darker place the older you become
I miss the times of seeing things as a giant bubble, and sitting in my bedroom when sick saying out load “Please god, make me better, make me better” and having the innocents to believe he/she would…….
On my way home I went to boots and bought some witchhazel, and I smelled it, it made me remember my late nana who would give this to me when I fell over and scraped my knee…. she would tell me it was a witch’s potion that would make me better…
How I miss those days.
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